Of Broken Paths
by kjayla
Summary: A re-write of The Broken Past. The world is made by the paths people choose to take. And Camelot is on a path that leads almost inevitably towards destruction. But that path can be averted and a new path taken. But only if people learn to understand.
1. The Walker of Paths

**AN: This story is a re-write of another story of mine titled The Broken Path. There have been a few very distinct changes from that story, and while I consider the story to still generally be the same story, the fact that I'm re-writing it in it's entirety convinced me to upload it as a different story. As it is, if you are new to this story, please read the AN because there will be important notes per chapter.**

Ariel followed the boy, invisible and silent. And annoyed. Incredibly annoyed. Although, not necessarily with the boy she was following (at her age, they were all children). No, she was annoyed with the boy's supposed friends.

She watched Merlin as he polished the King's armor, not even a hint of a smile on his face. It was wrong, all wrong, Merlin had always had such a bright smile, such a bright presence. But it was dimming, he wasn't any less powerful than before, no, he was still growing steadily more powerful, but his happiness, no, his happiness, his joy for life, that was fading away. He was suffering, that much was clear. He may be suffering in silence, but that didn't make his suffering any less. No, in Ariel's opinion, the silence only made it seem so much worse. The poor boy felt as though there was no one he could turn to, no one who would give him the comfort and acceptance that his heart and soul were desperate for.

She understood why he was so cautious. She wasn't a fool, nor did she take ignorance lightly. She had done careful research before coming to Camelot to find the boy. Some of the research was perhaps slightly… illegal, and perhaps also a little immoral. But she just wanted to help the boy. She wasn't even going to make an attempt on the King's life, which was what the majority of magic users tended to do. It seemed a bit short-sighted of them, in Ariel's opinion. Every failed attempt on the King's life, at least the ones that the man was aware of, only made the man more bitter.

Change could happen in any number of ways, and Ariel was well-enough acquainted with life to know that violence could be one of those ways, but violence was rarely the best way to bring about change. Not if you wanted that change to be accepted and nourished. Not if you wanted that change to last.

But it was too late, too late to change what others had already done. The past was the past. It was somewhat unfortunate though, that sometimes the past determined the present, and the present the future. She wondered what would happen if the boy ever did tell his King his secret… Like every other magic user she believed in the prophecies of Emrys, but she also walked through the paths of the past, and she understood that prophecies were made and broken on the choices of the people they were built around. No path was set in stone. No matter how much certain dragons liked to proclaim they were.

No, she feared that Emrys' prophecy was faltering. Not necessarily for lack of trying, oh had the boy tried and tried, but every step he took was haunted, and every time he so much as hoped for the future those hopes were dashed to pieces. She didn't like the consequences she could see should the boy speak up now. Yet, even with all the research she had done she couldn't say that there had ever been a time when the boy had truly had an opportunity to step forward. Worse, she understood why the boy didn't speak up, for all that he loved his friends, and for all that they professed to care for him, they did not always treat him the way anyone deserved to be treated. It was so easy to wonder if they truly cared for him when he was so casually treated as dispensable.

They had abandoned him. That had frustrated her to no end. When was the last time that Merlin had ever abandoned any of them? When had he ever failed them? But they had left him there, hurt and alone in those caves. If they had noted his absence they had made no effort to find him. She understood their urgency to help their King. She did. But Merlin was supposed to be their friend.

But Merlin… He had been devastated. And that wasn't the worst of it, no, the worst was that he had also been resigned to it. As though he wasn't even surprised, at least not completely. He had been hurt yes. But not surprised. And that hurt Ariel, it hurt Ariel to see this boy, this beacon of hope, so utterly devastated. He was a hero.

A hero to people that Merlin probably didn't even realize existed. A hero for his friends who didn't know what he did for them. A hero to those people in hiding that heard whispers of his great deeds. A hero to the common servant who watched a boy give his all for a King.

But they were going to destroy him.

Oh, he would continue to give them his all. Give them everything that he had, and do it willingly. But that didn't change the fact that it would destroy him in the process. That they would destroy him in the process.

It made Ariel furious.

They were all fools.

They weren't completely at fault, no she realized that the boy held some culpability. There might have been times when he could have spoken up, if not about his own magic, in more stalwart defense of others. He had made mistakes, though it was so difficult to see mistakes as they were being made. Hindsight was not a gift given in the present, only in the future. There were also some knights who would protect Merlin with their lives, no matter what oaths they had taken, if they knew the truth. They tried to protect him, even now. Rationally she knew that, she knew that they cared for him. But she was still so very angry. Angry at their abandonment, angry at their ignorance, angry at their prejudice.

She wanted to do something. Wanted them to know all that she knew, all the knowledge and understanding that she had gathered with her… very much illegal and slightly immoral research. Except, to do that would be very illegal and somewhat immoral. Well, more so than her acts already were.

But she would do it anyways. The poor boy had been alone for far too long. And if things didn't go as she hoped, well, then she would drug the boy and save him from the consequences of her actions.

Though he wouldn't thank her for it. She was nowhere near as powerful as Merlin, or Morgana or Mordred for that matter. But the boy often forgot to take care of himself and that made it easier to get to him than it should be. After she finished what she had come here to do she would have to make sure that that was corrected.

Because someone had to do something. The path they were on now was leading them to ruin and despair. Something had to change.

And Ariel might not be the right person for the job, but it seemed that she was the only one who was willing to do it.

She watched a little longer. Planning, thinking, considering.

She had walked the paths for a long time, just as her mother had before her. But there were limits to what she could handle. There was no way she could maintain more then ten people on the paths, and the more powerful the individual, the more energy it would take.

King Arthur, of course. The King was the other side of Merlin's coin. The one who shared much of Merlin's destiny. He was also Merlin's best friend. So yes, she would bring Arthur.

Gaius already knew most of the story. He did not need to see the path to be willing to support Merlin, but he would hopefully be a calming force, a voice of reason. She would be present, to a degree, but she did not think that her presence would have much of a calming effect, quite the opposite actually. Given, that for a certain value of captivity, she could be considered their captor. Sort of. Alright, so she was going to be holding them captive. Completely. She was not fool enough to not recognize that she was perhaps no better than those who sought to kill the King. Good intentions did not suddenly make her actions good or kind.

Sir Gwaine. The boy was so very protective of Merlin. He would knock sense into Arthur if necessary, and while she hoped that it wouldn't be necessary she also wasn't going to hold her breath. And if he wasn't capable of helping the King see sense, Ariel had no doubt that he would do his utmost to protect Merlin. Or at least she desperately hoped so, her time on the paths had led her to believe that was a highly likely outcome. Merlin had never put it to the test though, too frightened that perhaps Gwaine wouldn't.

Queen Guinevere. The poor girl. If Gwaine failed to calm Arthur, Ariel knew that Gwen was the one who stood the best chance, a better chance than Gwaine actually, but Gwen had been so painfully hurt by Magic, and while she had a sensible head on her shoulders that was not always enough when it came to scars and pain left behind by former experience. But she was Merlin's friend, the first one he had made in Camelot, and Ariel felt that that had to count for something.

Sir Percival was her next choice. He was a calming presence, and so long as children weren't in danger, slow to anger. It did not hurt that Lancelot's last request of Percival had been to keep Merlin safe.

With the King, Sir Gwaine, and Sir Percival all a part of the group she was targeting it would be wise to add Sir Elyan and Sir Leon as well. It was a close knit group, and it would be best to minimize any potential future divides, there were too many secrets as it was, it would do no good for the round table to have another secret dividing them.

That took her total to seven, and she was reasonably confident that she could still handle at least three more. Though she wasn't sure that there was anyone else that really needed to know.

She paused in thought. Her eyes skittering over Merlin as he put Arthur's armor away, moving on to cleaning the chambers.

Arthur was not the only one whose destiny was entwined with Merlin's. There were two others. Mordred and Morgana.

She thought it over carefully. The two of them were a dangerous choice. Walking the paths was an eye opening experience, it wasn't possible to walk another's path and to not come to better understand them. And while that could be good, it also meant that weaknesses could be exposed. Ariel desperately wanted to help Morgana return to her senses, how could she not? Morgana was a girl lost in a world that feared her, that hated her. Was it truly a surprise that she had learned to hate it in return? She was so lost in her hate that Morgana didn't even realize that she was still afraid.

But to bring Morgana would be to put Merlin at risk.

We can find another way. She had heard Merlin tell Morgana that, desperate and hopeful.

There is no other way.

Morgana had turned her back on Camelot. And Merlin had turned his back on Morgana. But how many nights had he mourned his mistakes? Mourned the loss of Morgana as she had been?

It's… lonely. To… be more powerful than any man you know and have to live like a shadow. To… be special and, and have to pretend you're a fool. I know how it feels. I understand.

Morgana could never be the woman she had once been, too much had happened for that to happen. Too much had been done. But Morgana's path was no more set in stone than Merlin's.

If there was another way, would Morgana be willing to take it? Even after she had gone so far down her path?

Could Ariel risk that?

Mordred was a different sort of danger. Ariel understood why Merlin didn't trust the boy, and Ariel was hesitant to show Mordred anything that would expose further weakness, to show Mordred anything that would anger him to the point that he would turn his back on Merlin. She did not want to compromise Merlin more than she had to.

You could never understand. Do you know how it feels to be a monster? To be afraid of who you are?

She cursed the dragon. Twice there had been people who could have understood Merlin, who Merlin could have offered understanding too, but both times the Dragon had looked at the possibilities, the prophecies and warned him to stay away, speaking of destiny and fate as though they were set in stone, as if there was no such thing as choice. He had failed to impart to Merlin that anything seen, anything dreamed, was a possibility, not an inevitability. And it had taken an undue toll on Merlin. She wished she could force Kilgharrah to see, to see the trials Merlin had faced, some due to the Dragon's own pride. But she was nowhere near powerful enough for that. Perhaps someday Kilgharrah would see what his pride and his stubbornness had cost the last Dragon Lord, but it would not be at her hands.

Why am I like this? Please, I need to know why!

She closed her eyes. Oh Goddess, forgive her if she chose wrong. But she could not let any of her kin suffer, could not refuse to grant her kin a second chance.

If she chose wrong, let the Goddess grant her the strength to right her wrongs. To curtail the suffering that she could cause.

She had chosen her side in this conflict. She stood with magic, and so she would offer Morgana and Mordred a second chance, she would do the only thing she could do to show them that there was another way. But she also stood with Merlin, with Emrys, and she would stop them, or give her life trying, before she allowed them to hurt him.

She pushed away the fear of choosing wrong, instead focusing her energy on the fact that she had a plan. She allowed herself to smile. This was going to work. This was going to be fun. Though to be fair, it might also be a little difficult.

She was going to have to drug Merlin. The Goddess knew he would try to stop her if he knew what she was going to do. To be perfectly fair, he would likely try to stop her even if he didn't fully understand what she was going to do. Her upcoming actions weren't exactly what Ariel would call innocent.

The drug would have to be strong enough to keep him asleep for at least 24 hours without causing him harm. Which was more difficult said then done. The boy could be effected by poisons and drugs, but none of them ever worked on him quite right. The magic that was a much a part of him as his flesh and blood always tried to protect him.

She only needed one night for her little machinations, but she would need the day to prepare her chosen subjects. She didn't want the boy to get in her way.

She was doing this for his own good after all.

Even if that didn't make her actions right.

She really shouldn't have enjoyed drugging Merlin as much as she had. It had been more difficult than she had anticipated to drug him in the first place, so perhaps it wasn't a surprise that she was so gleeful at being able to drug him at all.

If the boy ate it would be so much easier. But he had skipped breakfast again, for the third day in a row. She would need to have words with those friends of his. Not that it was their fault, Merlin was an adult, and it was his responsibility to take care of himself. But a friendly reminder that his health was just as important as anyone else's, that he was just as important as anyone else, wouldn't hurt. He needed to eat and sleep just like any other living creature.

He had definitely succumbed to the drug faster than was normal, which meant that the boy was running on Magic, his energy must have long ago run out.

She wondered if it also meant that Magic was helping her, if Magic saw her intentions, her hopes, and was standing behind her.

Her spells were coming stronger and easier than normal, and while it was possible that her conviction was that powerful, it could also be Magic giving its tacit approval. Whether or not that was true, Ariel didn't know, but she wanted to take it that way, wanted to believe it was true. It seemed less a betrayal if Magic supported her. Merlin was Magic, and Magic loved Merlin.

She expected that Merlin would stay unconscious for the 24 hours she needed him to stay unconscious for. Particularly since no one had thought to remove Merlin's neckerchief from his neck where she had spread the drug. After all Merlin didn't so much seem drugged as he seemed exhausted, and Gaius was all too aware of Merlin's propensity for pushing himself to his limits. The drug was merely ensuring that Merlin recover the energy he so desperately needed.

She was really doing the boy a number of favors.

It was somewhat gratifying to see how worried Arthur was. He and Gwen had jumped to Merlin's side the moment he collapsed in the middle of serving them breakfast, completely uncaring of the eggs all over Arthur's shirt and the sausages that had ended up in Gwen's skirts. Neither had noticed the subtle touch of her magic on their skin.

Once Merlin was unconscious most of the magic was rather easy. None of the Knights noticed her magic when it brushed against them during their training, and if they did, they had no way of recognizing it for what it was. She made sure to only mark them when they were further away from Mordred, who would be able to recognize it for what it was if he noticed. It would be difficult to mark him, Morgana, and Gaius, who did know Magic and would be able to recognize a marking for what it was if it wasn't done carefully enough. Thank the Goddess she didn't have to mark Merlin. His Magic would know the second another Magic tried to touch it.

Magic and Luck were both on her side though when Ariel transported herself to Morgana's side. The woman was in the middle of a complex piece of magic, one that Ariel had no qualms about accidentally disrupting. During the small backlash Morgana didn't seem to notice when magic not her own marked her. Ariel left as the girl started ranting.

Ariel was almost surprised that the experience didn't give her pause about adding Morgana. Instead it had only reaffirmed her decision. Morgana was so very lonely, so very scared. Her only companion Magic, a Magic that wanted so much more for Morgana than Morgana had found for herself.

Gaius was next, busy in his rooms making different potions, a small worried frown on his face, as he kept glancing towards Merlin's room where the boy was asleep. Between his own preoccupation, the warmth from the fire warming the potion, and the fact that even asleep Magic emanated from Merlin, Gaius didn't notice when a Magic that was not his or Merlin's touched him.

Which left Mordred.

Mordred who upon hearing of Merlin's collapse had treated everything with faint suspicion. Ariel couldn't completely blame him. Mordred had to know of the affinity Magic had for Merlin, recognized that Magic often bolstered Merlin's nonexistent energy. She thought she felt Mordred probing at Merlin's magic, as though looking for something wrong. It was good that Ariel hadn't used magic to achieve her purposes, Ariel had no doubt that Mordred would have been able to track the magic back to her. As it was, Mordred was lurking closer to the physician's chambers than he normally did.

As though he was trying to ensure that whatever threat that had caused Merlin to lose consciousness would not be able to reach him in his weakened state. It was thoughtful, and kind, and Ariel was grateful that there was someone who wanted to protect Merlin so adamantly, even if Merlin himself wasn't quite as grateful. It was also another reaffirmation that Mordred deserved this chance, deserved to understand.

Ariel just hoped that it wouldn't end poorly.

It was however, unfortunate that her marks, while they wouldn't hurt anyone, would however use a small portion of their energy to sustain themselves. And that meant that everyone was just a tad more tired than normal. Normally this wouldn't be much cause for concern, it wouldn't even be all that noticeable, except Mordred was on alert and looking for threats.

She could only be grateful that Mordred was splitting his time between the group and the hallway outside the physician's chambers.

But it would be dangerous to mark him right now, his magic was too close to the surface, between reaching out constantly towards Merlin's magic and trying to stay alert for any threat to the others. In Merlin's absence Mordred was the group's best defense against any magical attacks, and whether it was due to his own friendships with the group, or due to the fact that Mordred knew that Merlin would be upset if something happened to them while Merlin wasn't there to protect them.

Ariel wasn't sure if Mordred was afraid that Merlin would be angry if he failed to protect the others or if Mordred just wanted to earn Merlin's approval. Ariel thought it was probably a mixture of the two.

The more she watched the druid the more she realized that there was a third part. Mordred looked up to Merlin, yes, but it was more than that. Mordred looked at Merlin and saw the possibility of more, of friendship, of family.

If nothing went wrong then perhaps Ariel would be able to help Merlin realize what he was missing. But that would have to wait.

One plot at a time.

She needed to mark Mordred, but she also needed to gather them all together in one place. It would be difficult enough to pull Morgana along, she didn't need to make her life any more difficult by having to pull the others from different places. Thankfully Morgana was currently isolated, she just needed to bring the rest into an isolated area.

And then Mordred did half her job for her.

"Gaius."

Gaius looked up as Mordred slid into the Physician's Chambers. "Yes, Sir Mordred?"

"Have you really found nothing to explain Merlin's collapse?"

Gaius sent the boy a small smile, though his eyes couldn't hide his worry. "I'm sure it's nothing to worry about, if a person pushes their bodies too far their body will do what it has to to get the energy it needs."

Mordred frowned, "I understand that. But Merlin…"

"Is still human."

"Yes, but in all the years he's pushed himself has he ever collapsed this way?"

Gaius pursed his lips, "No, but he's been particularly stressed as of late." Gaius sent Mordred a fairly pointed look, but Mordred ignored it.

"Please, may I at least look him over. Just to ensure that there has been no foul play."

Gaius hesitated, but then nodded, "I suppose it wouldn't hurt."

Mordred nodded, grateful. "Thank you, Gaius."

Ariel followed Mordred as he slid into Merlin's small room. He glanced around somewhat dispassionately, "You deserve far better than this, Emrys." Mordred moved closer to where Merlin slept, his eyes darting over him. Mordred closed his eyes, hiding the flash of gold, but Ariel could feel the power move out of him. Mordred tilted his head, his hand moving forward. Ariel frowned when his hand moved unerringly towards Merlin's neckerchief. Mordred was frowning when he opened his eyes. He quickly but gently untied the neckerchief from Merlin's neck.

He eyed it gingerly but then pulled it up to smell it. He coughed, pulling away. It wasn't a strong smell, not enough that anyone would notice it if they weren't looking for it, but the concoction did smell almost sickly sweet.

"Gaius!" Mordred turned towards the main chamber. "I've found something. I think Merlin's been poisoned!"

The two of them muttered together over the neckerchief before Gaius sent Mordred to inform the King of what they'd found. "It's possible that this was someone who recognized Merlin and meant to hurt him, but it could also be someone trying to get Merlin out of the way in order to get closer to the King."

Arthur listened intently as Mordred told him what he and Gaius had found, his eyes narrowed thoughtfully. "Gather the Round Table Knights, have Gaius come as well to report on anything else he's found. It's important that we recognize any possible symptoms, we don't want anyone else poisoned." Arthur tilted his head thoughtfully, "I want you there as well, you were the one who realized that something was wrong."

Mordred nodded, looking somewhat nervous. "Of course, Sire."

In the end it was all too easy to mark Mordred. The boy was tense, his magic prodding insistently at Merlin, trying desperately to rouse him. The rest of the knights and Gwen all gathered into the chambers, their eyes serious. She pushed a small nudge of magic at the fire, causing it to spark and jump. Mordred's magic flared and Mordred was too busy pulling his magic back under control to notice her light touch.

She beamed brightly, this was far more enjoyable than she had expected it to be. She thought it best not to dwell too long on how much she enjoyed plotting. Plotting was not something she should grow accustomed to.

She frowned when she realized that Gaius still wasn't there. She hoped he hadn't found a way to wake Merlin. That would make everything so much more difficult.

She was appeased when Gaius hurried in, a thin frown marring his face. He would look much happier if Merlin had woken. She was even further appeased when both Arthur and Gwaine asked after Merlin. It was nice to see evidence that they cared about him. Mind, she felt the tiniest bit guilty for being the cause of their worry, but it was for a good cause.

She ignored them as they all settled down, it was important that she do this right, after all, doing it wrong could very easily destroy their minds, and that would be unpleasant for everyone involved. Merlin would most definitely murder her. Mind, he might murder her anyways. She grinned cheerfully at the thought and had to stop herself from whistling aloud. Oh dear, her mind was becoming quite morbid in her old age.

She did, however, notice when Mordred stiffened his eyes carefully roving over the room. She hurried her pace, still carefully weaving her magic. She was counting on Mordred not drawing any overt attention to her.

She felt Morgana's magic stirring, and she winced, as Morgana's magic lashed out, trying to figure out what sort of sorcery was pulling at her magic. Mordred was similarly starting to push at her with his magic. She diverted both of their attacks, grateful that neither knew exactly what they were facing. She was no regular witch, she was a walker of paths.

She was so close.

Gaius had stiffened as well, the power in the room swelling so that even he could feel it. He stood abruptly, his voice cracking, "Sire."

She was so close, she could not let this end before it had even truly started.

She used the tiniest bit of spare magic to knock both Mordred's and Arthur's chairs backwards. Several Knight's jumped and Mordred's attention was diverted for just an instant, checking his King for injury both with his eyes and with tendrils of magic.

Morgana's magic made another angry attack, and Ariel could feel Morgana's fear. She did not want to be helpless again, but she didn't know what sort of magic was being weaved, did not know how to combat it.

Mordred froze and Ariel could feel his magic caress her own where it was marking Arthur, she could feel him trying to pry it off, but he was being careful, afraid of what ripping it off could do, it was always dangerous to stop a spell in the middle of being cast, it could always have unexpected but dire consequences.

It was too late now anyways. Her spell was woven.

She moved until she was on the other side of the room from the fire, before causing the fire to flare once more. Arthur pushed himself away from the fire, trying to reassure Gwen that he was fine.

Gaius and Mordred were both bracing themselves. The power in the room was thick enough to choke on. She let her invisibility fall away. There were a few started yells, Gwaine and Leon both actually managed to draw their swords.

She smiled at them, "Vea ala gifte."

She giggled a little bit as they all slumped into unconsciousness. Weaving a spell that powerful always left her feeling a little drunk.

She was having far too much fun.

She felt her magic pulling her into her own spell, into the past. It was time to walk the path.

She really hoped that Merlin didn't kill her once this was all over.

 **AN: Alright, for anyone who knows anything about my other story, or who followed the chapter update from the last story to get to this story... I have the next few chapters re-written... They'll go up one at a time as I get the chance to edit them. This project comes second to college and work, but it will NOT take me three years to get to the next chapter... (If all goes well it shouldn't even take much longer than a week... but I'm not making promises...)**


	2. The Path of Another

**AN: Wow, sorry this took so long to get put up. Unfortunately something terrible happened and I lost the entirety of my work... Fortunately, after much stress and time I miraculously managed to get it all back. Miracles apparently do happen.**

 **Here's chapter two!**

Mordred was woken by the sound of a muffled groan. He didn't move, didn't so much as make a sound. Something was wrong, and until he knew what, it would be best not to draw attention to himself.

Soft curses filled the air and Mordred recognized the voice as Gwaine's. "I'm not hungover, that means I didn't get drunk, so what in the blazes is going on here?"

Mordred waited a second to see if anyone responded, but there was nothing. It was probably as safe as Mordred could expect it to be. He opened his eyes, surprised when he saw a clear blue sky and trees. He was fairly certain he hadn't been outside, Gwaine's muttering about not being drunk was starting to make sense. He moved slowly, but there was no pain. He didn't feel drugged, not the way Emrys had been drugged. But something had to have happened for him to have been transported from the castle to a forest. He pushed himself up, glancing around. Gwaine moved over, helping him to his feet. "We've got a problem." The man said, his voice serious.

Mordred raised an eyebrow, "I can see that."

Gwaine shook his head, "It gets worse." He moved to the side and pointed towards a figure on the ground. Mordred hissed as he realized who it was. He glanced around the rest of the sleeping figures. King Arther, Queen Guinevere, Sir Leon, Sir Percival, Sir Elyan, and Gaius. Those all made sense, in fact, as best as Mordred could remember, all of them and been present during those last few moments of consciousness.

Morgana had not. "A problem. Yes, I see what you mean." He glanced around. "We should wake the others."

Gwaine shook his head, "I can't get within a foot of anyone. I was only able to get to you once you had woken up." He shook his head, "How much magic would it take to do this?"

Mordred shrugged. "I don't know." It wasn't even a lie, he really had no clue how much power something like this would need, mostly because he wasn't quite sure what _this_ was.

Elyan groaned and both Mordred and Gwaine jumped towards him. For a second Mordred felt a level of resistance, stopping him from moving closer to Elyan, but as the man moved the barrier fell.

"What's going on?" Elyan asked. His eyes landed on his sister and he jerked forward, "Gwen!" He was stopped a foot away from her and his eyes widened as he tried to push past it. Gwaine pulled him back.

"Calm down, mate. We can't get to them until they wake up."

"What's going on?"

"I was wondering the same thing."

Mordred whirled around at the sound of Morgana's voice. Her hands were raised in warning and Mordred tensed, moving for his sword.

A sword that wasn't there.

"What did you do?" Gwaine asked, his voice tight.

Morgana smiled, but it was cold and dark and vicious. "Always so quick to blame me." Her face twisted in a mockery of sadness, "It always makes me want to do something to earn that blame." She flung her hand out and forward and Mordred tensed in preparation, but nothing happened. He blinked at Morgana as she stared at them in surprise, before her face hardened, she flung her hands out again, this time incanting,"Hleap on bæc!" Again, Mordred could feel Morgana's magic rise up, but still nothing happened. "What have you done?"

"I think the real question, is what have _you_ done." Mordred turned to see that Arthur was on his feet. His eyes were narrowed at Morgana.

Morgana hissed at him, "I had nothing to do with this."

"As though I would believe a word you say."

"Arthur." It was Gwen's voice, soft and soothing as she stood. "I saw as well as you that whatever spell she just tried to cast didn't work. And while I find her presence and our situation highly suspicious, let's not jump to conclusions."

Gwaine sighed, running a hand through his hair. "It would have been better if we had all gotten drunk."

Arthur sent him a withering glare, "No, Gwaine, it really wouldn't. Some of us are respectable."

Morgana scoffed, "A peasant Queen, peasant Knights, a King who barely knows how to rule, and an old man. At most Leon is the only respectable one here."

"At least you know better than to include yourself, Witch." Mordred blinked in surprise, while the love between Arthur and Morgana had withered, Mordred had never heard Arthur sound quite so bitter. Normally, the bitterness was solely Morgana's domain.

"Better a witch, than a fool."

"Please, last I checked the lot of you are actually adults. Would it be too much to request that you actually behave that way."

As one, all of them turned towards the voice, Mordred once again reached for a sword that wasn't there, he noticed several of the other Knights reacting the same. He once again felt Morgana's power swell, only to dissipate when she tried to cast.

There was a sigh, "Oh, calm down. I'm not trying to kill any of you!" They all stared as an old woman stepped forward, she looked harmless, a head full of white hair, a face full of wrinkles, a smile that wouldn't look out of place on an old grandmother, and an air of authority that made Mordred want to straighten his back and stand at attention. He could sense that she was powerful, perhaps not as powerful as Morgana, and certainly not as powerful as Emrys was, but still powerful.

She had been the one to bring them there, that was obvious, and Mordred hadn't been able to stop her. Emrys would have, but Emrys had been unconscious, he suspected he knew the reason for that now. "You drugged him. You drugged Merlin." The words tore out of him in anger and shock, and he reached for his magic, but felt it dissipate around him.

The woman shrugged, "Yes, of course." The others looked surprised.

"Why would you drug Merlin?" Gwaine's voice was loud and angry, "Why would you hurt him?"

"I didn't hurt him!" The woman looked hurt at the accusation, "I drugged him. He needed the sleep anyways."

"So you drugged Merlin and kidnapped us, why not just kidnap Merlin with us?" Percival asked quietly.

The old woman beamed, "Oh, and isn't that just an intelligent question! I do like you, Percival." Her smile dimmed, "I brought you here, and I'll let return you to your homes once I've shown you the path that's been walked. This is hardly a nefarious plot, no one will be killed, or blackmailed, or hurt, not by me or by any of the others." She shrugged, "And I drugged Merlin because he would be the person most likely to discover just what was going on, and I didn't want him to stop me." Arthur let out a small snort and Mordred felt a small burn of indignation, it really wasn't fair for Arthur to be so condescending to Emrys.

Strangely enough, Morgana agreed. "Merlin was the only one who ever seemed to realize things were wrong. Even when I thought I'd gotten rid of him and left him for dead he still managed to ruin my plans."

Arthur turned to her, "Left him for dead? When did you leave him for dead?"

Morgana just shrugged and the old woman cleared her throat pointedly. "Of course, Merlin _will_ be alright, but quite honestly, it would have been cruel to force Merlin to go through this with the rest of you." She shrugged again, "Mind, this is the lesser of the cruelties, but a cruelty all the same."

Mordred watched as a number of them exchanged confused glances, it seemed obvious to Mordred that the woman cared for Emrys, that she was invested in him. This wasn't much of a surprise for Mordred, it was difficult to see Emrys and not be in awe of him, to not care for him. Given that she was obviously a magic user, it was no surprise that she felt similarly. But, the majority of the group weren't magic users, had never seen how truly magnificent Emrys really was, and to them it didn't make sense. Mordred, however, couldn't help but worry about what sort of situation would leave Emrys exempt due to cruelty.

Arthur growled, moving closer to the sorceress. "Take us back. Now. We have no desire to play whatever sick game you've come up with." He stopped several feet away from the sorceress, though due to the surprised look on his face Mordred didn't think that had been completely voluntary.

The old lady sighed, "Oh, calm yourself. All you have to do is walk the path, it's not as though I'm making you experience the path." She gave all of them a pointed look, "And if the lot of you could stop attempting violence against me or one another, this whole situation will resolve much more pleasantly, particularly because none of you are capable of committing violence, neither physically or with magic. Not against me, not against each other. I'm sure you'll be relieved to know that I can't perpetrate any violence either."

Mordred remembered Morgana's failed attempt at magic earlier, as well as his own. Gaius glanced at him surreptitiously, eyebrow raised and Mordred nodded. Gaius had been one of the last to awaken, and had missed the earlier confrontation. Whether it was true that the old woman wouldn't be able to hurt them, however, was still up for debate.

Arthur was glaring at her, before whirling around and storming off, commanding the others to follow him. They shared a glance with one another before they followed after the King, it would be unwise to just let Arthur march away by himself. He saw Ariel roll her eyes exasperatedly, but did nothing to stop them. Morgana scoffed and primly sat herself down on a convenient log.

They didn't get far before they were stopped by an invisible barrier.

Arthur whirled again, his hands clenched angrily. "Let us go." His voice was quiet and dangerous, "We want nothing to do with you or your schemes."

The woman just sighed, "You do realize, that technically speaking, I've abducted you, what makes you think that I care what you want?" It was a good, but worrisome point, and it did nothing to make any of them feel better, much less Arthur.

"Let. Us. Go." Arthur's voice was cold and serious.

"No." Her voice was completely implacable. "And you might as well stop with this foolishness. The sooner we get started the sooner you can get back to your precious kingdom." There was something bitter in her voice, the first real sign that perhaps, while she cared for Emrys, she did not care much for the rest of them. Or at least not for Arthur.

Given that she was a sorceress, that was perhaps more surprising than it should be.

"My knights will come for us, and you will regret this."

Morgana snorted at that, and when Mordred glanced at her he could see amusement on her face. Given how much she had hurt Camelot and the fact that the Knights of Camelot had never so much as laid a scratch on her, Mordred agreed that perhaps it was not the most effective of threats.

The woman, however, just rolled her eyes again. "Yes, yes, whatever you say. Now can we get started?"

Arthur's face set stubbornly, "No."

"I'm not actually giving you much of a choice."

"I will not bow to some old sorceress' demands!"

Gwen broke in before the situation could escalate. "Arthur, perhaps it would be best to…" she sent a confused look at the old woman, "uh, walk the path, or whatever it is she wishes us to do."

Arthur's eyes widened, "Gwen!"

Morgana scoffed again, "Gwen always was sensible. You heard the woman earlier just as well as the rest of us, although, I suppose it's not unusual for you to completely miss what's right in front of you. She said the sooner we begin, the sooner we finish."

Gwen sent Morgana a tired look. "Yes, that. Our friend has been drugged and may need us. But we cannot help him if we are trapped here." She paused, thoughtful, "And it would be wise to avoid angering her into doing anything… untoward."

Arthur frowned considering her words. Mordred hated that it was the hint of possible threat that caused Arthur the most thought, although he was grateful to see that while Gwen did seem to believe it a possibility, they had all been abducted after all, she seemed far more worried about Emrys than she did about any possible injury.

He didn't trust the woman in front of them, but he also didn't see the harm in playing along with her scheme until a better opportunity arose.

"Fine." Arthur snapped, turning to the woman. "We'll walk the path, can we begin, already?"

Morgana scoffed again and Mordred heard her mutter something about how maybe she didn't want to go along with this situation, and how Arthur wasn't King here.

Everyone, including the old woman, ignored her. "Well, I was going to tell you what I meant by walking the path, but the Goddess knows that after that display of impudence, I simply don't have the patience for it. I'll let you figure it out yourselves." She hesitated, the first real sign of uncertainty they'd seen from her so far. "I imagine that, well, that there may be questions, and while I'm sure that some of you are more informed on the matter than others and can clarify anything that needs clarifying, if, by chance, there are questions that none of you can answer, I will do my best to answer. The less misunderstandings we have the better."

Arthur snorted, "Like we'd trust anything that you have to say." Several of the Knights nodded in agreement, although Gwen and Gaius seemed less inclined to agree. Mordred exchanged glances with Morgana, the look she gave him was cold, but Mordred could also see that she was worried, he wondered if she too was trying to figure out why the phrase, _walk the path_ , sounded so familiar.

"Is everyone ready?" The woman asked, her voice soft now, as though she didn't think that any of them could possibly be ready.

It was not exactly reassuring, but Mordred nodded along with the rest of them. After all, waiting around wouldn't help him feel any more ready for whatever this woman had planned. Morgana stood, tossing her hair haughtily, several of the knights braced their feet as though in preparation for a fight.

The world went white, and Mordred could see nothing, not the world around him, not the others, not even his own body. It was disorienting and confusing and Mordred didn't like it.

The world came back into focus and Mordred felt dizzy as he took a step forward. Several of the others also looked dizzy, Gwen and Gaius both actually stumbled.

They had been magically transported to a village, although it seemed as though they'd missed a large portion of the day. The sun had already disappeared and the stars were just beginning to become visible.

"This place looks familiar." Arthur muttered quietly, "Why does this place look familiar?"

Mordred looked around again, but the village looked no more familiar this time around then it had the time before.

"Doesn't look familiar to me." Gwaine muttered.

"Nor me, Sire." Leon agreed

"No, he's right." Everyone stared at Morgana in surprise, but she was ignoring them, turning slowly, "This place does look familiar."

"Ealdor." Gwen breathed out, "This is Ealdor."

Mordred shared a glance with the others, but none of the Knights seemed to recognize the name.

"Are you quite certain, Your Highness?" Gaius asked, his voice worried.

Gwen nodded, "Yes, this is Ealdor." She frowned, "Why would we…" Her voice trailed off as a scream split the air. "No. Hunith!" And then the Queen was running towards where the scream had come from. "Hunith!"

"Gwen?" Arthur ran after her and Mordred followed, even Morgana and Gaius were running. "Gwen! What are you doing?"

Gwen stopped, turning towards him, her eyes panicked. "She said that it would be cruel to make Merlin watch. What if something is happening to his mother?" Another scream split the air and Gwen started running again, Arthur was frozen for a split moment before he followed after her. Gwen seemed to know exactly where she was going, and Mordred hated the fact that she seemed to be headed for exactly where the screams were coming from.

Ealdor, Gwen had said. Was this where Emrys had grown up? Why would the woman have brought them here? He felt something close to panic, Emrys would be devastated if anything happened to his mother. He chased after Gwen and Arthur, the rest of the group with him. He absently noted that Gaius could be surprisingly spry when need be, and that Morgana was still capable of caring for others, if the look of worry on her face meant anything.

He could still hear the screams, but something else felt off. Despite the noise they were making, and despite the screams, the rest of the village was quiet, no one reacted to Gwen's yells, or the sound of a large group running. What was going on?

Gwen stopped outside of a small house, and Mordred could see that she was trembling, but a second later she had rounded her shoulders, and ignoring Arthur's demands for her to wait, she charged into the house. The rest of them followed.

The screams and cries were coming from a woman laying flat on the bed, and while she was in obvious pain, it wasn't from any of the feared reasons. No, this woman, and one look at her face made it clear it was the mother of Emrys, was in labor.

But it was all wrong. The woman was far too young to be the mother of Emrys. And if by chance, his mother just had a perpetually young face, Emrys had never once mentioned that his mother was pregnant, much less this close to being due. It didn't matter how loyal Emrys was to Arthur, Emrys would have found a way to be back in Ealdor for such an occasion.

And while Emrys may not be willing to confide in Mordred, the shock on the faces of the Knights, the shock on Gaius' face, meant that it was as much a surprise to them as it was to him. And while Emrys kept any number of secrets, Mordred couldn't imagine he had kept something like this from Gaius.

Gwen was the first to react. "Excuse me, is there anything I can do? Can I help?" The woman helping Emrys' mother didn't react. Hadn't reacted to their abrupt presence into the small home.

Something was very off.

"They can't hear you. None of them can." Mordred whirled to see the old woman standing in the corner, her eyes on Emrys' mother. "They can't see you either, can't so much as sense your presence." She glanced at them, "After all, you aren't really here."

Gwen wasn't really paying attention though, her eyes narrowed. "She's too young." She was staring at Hunith. "Far too young. I was here a few years ago, during my banishment, she's too young."

A sudden burst of power filled the room and a new wail, a much younger one, filled the air, the pained cries and screams died down, filled instead by much younger cries.

The woman helping Emrys' mother was cooing, holding the baby so that his mother could look at him. "Merlin." The woman said quietly, "My precious, little Merlin."

"Merlin?" Several voices asked in unison.

Gwaine pushed past Gwen to look closer, "Wow, he's tiny."

Arthur pulled him back. "Keep your distance." He sent a suspicious look at the old woman, who ignored him in favor of watching the baby and his mother. She looked absolutely enraptured, her face soft in awe.

Mordred couldn't blame her, the power coming off of the baby was incredible. He had known that Emrys was powerful, but Goddess, to be this powerful while still a newborn? How was that even possible?

Leon was frowning at the old woman. "Why would you want us to watch Merlin's birth?" He looked as though he wanted to question the woman's sanity. "This can't be all that you're planning."

The woman looked up, "You've only just stepped on the path."

It finally clicked in Mordred's mind. "You're a Walker of Paths." He stared at the woman, reevaluating everything he'd thought of her.

The woman looked up at him, a sad look in her eyes. "Yes. Like my mother before me, and her father before her, and his father before him."

Morgana was staring in shock, "A Walker of Paths? I had thought the last of the line had been killed in the purge?" She sent a scathing look at Arthur at that.

The woman just shrugged a sad smile, "My sister and my husband were both killed, she claimed to be an only child, pretended to be a Walker, even though she was not. My husband backed her claim, pretended that it was her he'd married. I escaped."

"So this is revenge?" Arthur asked, his voice bitter.

The woman just laughed, "Revenge? No. I've seen too many people walk that path." She sent Morgana a sad look. "I know where that path almost always inevitably leads." She turned back to Arthur, "No, this is because I'm tired, because I'm desperate. Because you, like your father before you, claim to see the darkness in my heart, and the heart of all magic users, but know nothing of us. You know so very little, King Arthur. And because of this ignorance, you walk a path that will lead to disaster, but it isn't too late to change the path we're on."

"Magic is evil. It corrupts." Arthur looked enraged, "I saw what it did to Morgana, I've seen magic cause more harm to my people and my family than any other force has."

Morgana scoffed, but the woman just shrugged again. "Perhaps. But you haven't seen the paths that were walked to arrive at that point." She was looking at Emrys again, "This is not one of those paths, not a path led by vengeance, or anger, or retaliation. But it may teach you more than you'd think."

Elyan spoke up for the first time since their arrival in Ealdor. "When you say we're going to walk the path, do you mean that we're going to see…" He hesitated, "Merlin's past?"

The woman beamed, "Ah, an intelligent young man." She nodded, "Yes."

"I thought you were trying to teach us that Magic wasn't evil." Leon asked, his voice dry. "I don't see how watching Merlin will teach us that."

The woman stared at Leon, "Oh, my reasons are far more complex than something as simple as teaching the lot of you that Magic isn't evil, that should not be so difficult to learn that it would require such extreme intervention. But, it may surprise you what sort of things you can learn when you walk someone else's path."

Mordred felt a hint of anxiety at that thought. He had a better idea than many of the others at what sort of things they would discover by walking Emrys' path. Not only would Emrys' magic be revealed, but his own magic would be revealed as well, and the fact that Arthur couldn't physically harm him was little consolation. To lose Arthur's trust would be devastating. He felt his heart constrict, because Emrys would awaken to a completely new world, one where not only his magic, but his every secret would be revealed. Not just to Arthur, but to the rest of them as well, and that included Morgana.

What sort of lesson did this woman consider a good enough reason to so cruelly expose Emrys?

Percival was the one that asked what most of them seemed to be thinking, "Why Merlin?"

Mordred suspected that he knew the answer, and that was absolutely terrifying.

 **AN: Thanks for reading, I shall do my best to not make you wait quite as long for the next update!**


	3. The Stones that Built the Path

**AN: Moment of honesty... I finished this chapter like... three months ago. But I was really hesitant about posting it, last time I posted this chapter I had a lot of people upset with me. For understandable reasons, I didn't think to warn that the chapter might be distressing. But I also didn't want to change this chapter too much, because I do feel strongly about what I wrote.**

 **So, I dithered. For months. So here's the deal... there is the attempted suffocation of a child in this chapter by their incredibly distressed mother. If that is something you want to avoid reading (for very understandable reasons) look for the *** That indicates that the next section is something you might want to avoid. The section ends with another ***.**

 **Sorry for the long delay.**

The old lady smiled, and Gwen found it odd that she her smile could seem so genuine and unthreatening. "Now dears, I really don't think I'm going to tell you. Words only do so much, and in this case, don't quite do the situation justice." She sighed, "Some things just need to be seen to be understood. And all of you desperately need to understand."

She gave every single one of them a quailing look.

Morgana was the first to speak, her voice harsh, "I'm not one of _them_." She practically spit the last word, and Gwen flinched at the venom in her voice. "Why am I here?"

The old woman stared at her, and Gwen could practically see the old woman deliberating over whether to answer. "He never wanted to hurt you, you know." The woman said quietly her voice firm, and Morgana flinched as though the words were painful.

"Well then he shouldn't have."

The woman shrugged, "No, I suppose he shouldn't have." She gave Morgana a compassionate look. "But then, you also did things you shouldn't have. A step on your path that altered the course of his, just as his altered yours. But you are here, because even now, he desperately hopes that you can both find another way." The woman looked away, her whole body sagging as though she carried a heavy weight. "He doesn't know how to bridge the gap, and maybe this will do nothing but widen the gap, but I had to try."

"There is no other way." The words sounded rehearsed, as though Morgana had said them over and over.

"So you said." The woman shrugged, "It's your choice, of course, it's your path."

"I won't change my mind," Morgana said, her voice cold. "Send me back."

The woman shook her head. "You need to understand." The refusal was still compassionate, but Gwen could hear the finality in it.

Arthur spoke this time, and Gwen prayed that he kept his anger in check. "And why would we need to understand my manservant of all people."

The old woman just smiled sadly, "I suppose that's something you're going to have to figure out yourself."

She began to disappear, the edges of her body growing faint and transparent. "Wait!" Mordred called out, his voice quiet and pleading. The woman's fade halted, and she looked at him patiently, Mordred looked surprised to see that the woman had listened to him. "What's your name?"

The old lady tilted her head and then gave a short curtsey, "You may call me Ariel." And with that she faded away completely. For a second it felt as though the room around them faded as well, but when Gwen turned to face the room she found that it was focused again, though it didn't seem to be the same moment in time.

Merlin was still a baby, still had the look of babies recently born. Hunith was humming quietly as she rocked him. She looked exhausted, but there was an air of contentment surrounding her. Gwen was grateful for the quiet moment. She wasn't sure what sort of things they'd be shown from Merlin's past, but it couldn't hurt to know him better.

Merlin was always very quiet about his life before he'd come to Camelot. She remembered the first time she'd come to Ealdor, with Arthur and Morgana in tow, the kindness Hunith had shown them despite the desperate circumstances that had brought them all there. She glanced at Morgana again, she had put as much distance between her and the rest of them as she could, but was watching Hunith with a tired but warm look in her eyes. Gwen found herself grateful to see that look, rather than the now normal anger and condescension. But then, Hunith had been nothing but kind to Morgana, it made sense that Morgana was able to separate her feelings for Hunith from how she felt for those of Camelot.

She wondered at her own easy acceptance of the situation. It was bizarre, yes, but then, she had once been turned into a doe, this wasn't much stranger than that. Mostly it came down to the fact, that for now at least, Gwen couldn't see the harm in allowing this to play out.

It might actually do Arthur some good. As much as Arthur tried, he still didn't completely understand how different the lives of those not born into nobility were, was still, somehow, under the impression that they weren't so different from his own life. It was something Gwen had never quite figured out how to teach him, despite her position as his wife.

She looked around at the others, Arthur looked distinctly unhappy, and was sending suspicious glances at Morgana, actually almost all of them were sending suspicious glances towards the angry witch. The only exceptions being Gaius, who looked far more apprehensive than Gwen felt the situation warranted, and Mordred who was staring at Merlin with a sort of awed excitement. It was a strange reaction, Mordred and Merlin didn't seem particularly close, and Gwen couldn't think of any reasons why Mordred would be quite so in awe. It also didn't explain the sort of knowing gleam in his eyes.

But then, Mordred and Gaius were the only two who _didn't_ seem to find it strange that they were visiting Merlin's past. What did they know?

Gwen didn't ask, the situation was strange enough, and tensions between all of them were already high enough, what with having been abducted by a sorceress, and Morgana's presence. She didn't want to add to the tension unless it became necessary to do so.

Instead she let herself relax, watching the tender scene between mother and son. There was one moment when she thought the shadows were dancing, but she blinked and everything seemed normal again. Despite the bizarre circumstances, there was something about the scene that felt normal and comfortable. Slowly the others seemed to relax, soothed by the sound of baby gurgles and soft cooing. Gwen couldn't help her own soft coos, Merlin was an adorable baby. It made Gwen ache for a child of her own.

They had just gotten comfortable when the world shifted white, the way it had before they'd first arrived in Ealdor.

When the world rearranged itself, and the small dizzy spell passed, Gwen could see that they were still in the small home, Merlin seemed a little bit older, perhaps a few months old. He was laying on his stomach on a raggedy blanket while Hunith stood at the counter kneading dough.

Hunith was singing softly, a sad song about a lover who'd died. Merlin was making little noises, trying to get Hunith's attention. When after a few moments he proved unsuccessful he turned his attention to a wooden dragon resting just out of range of his tiny hands. He made grunting noises as he tried to roll towards it, but was completely unsuccessful.

Merlin reached for it again, apparently undeterred by his earlier failure. This time however, his eyes glowed gold and the dragon dragged across the floor and into his hands. His little baby giggle was overshadowed by the numerous gasps from around the room.

Gwen herself was frozen in shock. Had Merlin… had he just used Magic?

He couldn't have. It wasn't possible. It couldn't be possible.

Magic was evil. Magic corrupted. Magic, and those who used it, couldn't be trusted.

Wasn't that what everyone said?

Movement beside her drew her eyes. Morgana had stepped forward, her mouth open in shock, her eyes a mixture of angry, hurt, and confused.

Gwen was confused too. Surely people weren't born evil, and Merlin was just a baby, Merlin was good. But then, hadn't she thought that of Morgana as well?

This wasn't possible.

But, she had seen his pretty blue eyes turn gold, had seen the dragon move into his hands. Her eyes turned to the rest of the group. Gaius was standing, his face drawn with worry lines, between Arthur and the baby. Arthur, however, just looked shocked.

Gwen opened her mouth to say something. To say anything. But before she could figure out what she could say to make everything okay there was a soft gasp. As one, everyone's eyes turned to look at Hunith. Gwen wasn't sure what emotion she would have expected to see, fear, maybe. Terror. But not pain, not a sorrow so real and so intense that Gwen felt like it would drown her. Merlin was completely unaware of the emotions he'd brought out in his mother, throughly distracted by the wooden dragon in his hands.

"My baby. Oh, my baby." The words came out quiet, broken. "Please, anything but this, not now. Not after everything. Please, please, not my baby." Hunith seemed to slide to her knees, hands messy with dough coming around to hug herself. She was staring at her baby, tears in her eyes. Merlin rolled over the dragon still in his hands, and his eyes flashed gold again, at first Gwen couldn't tell what he'd done, but then she saw the the light and shadows around the dragon were dancing, causing the dragon to look as though he was swimming through the shadows. Merlin squealed happily, moving the dragon back and forth through the air, the shadows sliding around it.

Hunith made another choked sound. She stood from where she'd fallen to her knees, her movements were jerky as she quickly rinsed her hands in a bucket of water and pulled the curtains closed around their small window. She reached for Merlin, her hands shaking. She picked him up, gently removing the woodcarving from his hands and placing it on the table.

She held the baby close, and Gwen could see her shaking, her sobs tearing through her body.

Gwen had to look away, unable to bear the terrible grief in Hunith's eyes. This couldn't be real. This had to be a trick, a cruel trick.

But her eyes landed on Gaius, who was watching the scene with resigned eyes. He wasn't surprised, and Gwen realized he had to have known. Merlin had lived with him for years, and while Merlin was obviously capable of keeping a secret, it would have been difficult for him to hide it from the person he shared such close quarters with. No, Gaius wasn't surprised, he was resigned and determined, but not surprised.

Her eyes flicked to the next individual, purposefully avoiding Arthur. Gwaine had a small frown on his face, and Gwen could see that while he was surprised he wasn't shocked. Almost as though he had received an unexpected answer to a question he'd known to ask.

Elyan and Percival both looked shocked, though they both looked hesitant to actually pass judgment. It was clear that neither of them had had even an inkling that Merlin had magic.

Leon, too, looked shocked, but where the others looked hesitant, Leon looked terrified. Gwen wasn't surprised, Leon had grown up in the very heart of Camelot, his father had been good friends with Uther. Gwen remembered from working in the household of Leon's family, that his father had hated magic second to only Uther. Gwen supposed terror was better than hatred, but it still ached somewhere that Leon could be reduced to such an emotion based off the actions of a baby.

Mordred looked awed. Not a hint of shock or surprise. How, Gwen wondered, had Mordred discovered the truth, when the rest of them hadn't?

Morgana looked outraged. She also looked devastated. Gwen had to look away, because the pain in Morgana's eyes was too human, too real, and it was easier to think of her old friend as someone full of hatred, rather than someone who could be so easily hurt.

She braced herself before she let her eyes fall to the last of their group. Her husband, her beautiful Arthur, his shock had faded, but in it's place was a terrible anger and an awful disgust, beneath it Gwen could see hints of hurt, but it was heavily outweighed.

She felt sick. This was Merlin. It was the man who had seen her worth when she was still a serving girl, who had made her laugh when she thought she would never laugh again, who had believed in her when everyone else saw something worthless, who had trusted her when everyone was accusing her.

Who had apparently been keeping a terrible secret since the day that they'd met.

But it was Merlin.

How could she soothe Arthur's pain, defuse his anger, when she felt so confused, so lost? Because it did hurt.

Her attention was diverted by Gaius taking a small breath, looking at Arthur as though he was going to try and reassure him, defuse his anger, give an explanation… something.

Before he could speak though, Hunith was speaking aloud, her voice cracking. There were tears rolling down her cheeks. "My poor baby, you're already dead." She hiccupped, "They'll hunt you down, the same way they did your father. They'll hurt you, kill you. They don't care, don't care that you're a baby." It was true, Gwen knew, Uther had killed any number of babies, not even because they had magic, but because their parents had had magic. "They don't care that you've never hurt a soul." The tears were tracking down her cheeks faster and faster. "You may be alive and breathing, but you've already been condemned to die. Oh, my sweet, little Merlin, they will never trust you, never try to understand you. They don't care, they won't even give you a chance. You're already dead."

Gwen couldn't help her own sob from breaking past her lips. She took a step forward, her hand stretching out towards Hunith and Merlin. The pain she'd felt at the realization of Merlin's magic faded against the devastation Hunith felt. She wanted to wrap them in her arms, wanted to comfort them. Her heart felt as though it would shatter. She couldn't imagine the pain that Hunith felt, holding her tiny child and knowing that he was condemned, that he would be drowned or burned or hanged. Arthur caught her arms, and dragged them down, pulling her away from Hunith and Merlin. She pulled away from him. Couldn't he see? Merlin was a baby, an innocent baby. What if that was his baby, her baby, their baby?

Hunith's sobs were escalating, "Merlin, my precious, little Merlin." Gwen feared that the woman would drop Merlin, she was shaking so violently. Merlin was staring up at his mother, his eyes wide and blue, his hand reaching up as though to stop the tears. If anything it made Hunith cry harder. Gwen couldn't help it, her feet moving forward again, it didn't matter that she wasn't with them, not really, that there was nothing she could do to help them. She couldn't just stand there and watch someone hurt this way. Arthur pulled her back again and Gwen wanted to scream, her throat ached from sobs that hadn't escaped, from words she couldn't force out.

She turned to Arthur, but his eyes were blank and cold, all of his emotions hidden behind a cold, implacable fury.

It was easy, at that moment to see that he and Morgana were related.

They both could be so much like Uther at times. She turned away from him, unable to bear that look in his eyes. Arthur was a good man, a better man than his father.

She wasn't the only one crying. Morgana had drawn away, hugging herself tightly, tears in her eyes. Gaius looked sorrowful, Mordred was pushing away a tear, his eyes understanding and pained. Percival had small trails down his cheek where tears had fallen.

None of them were completely unaffected as they watched Hunith grieve over her son as though he were already dead.

She turned back to Hunith whose sobs were slowly subsiding, her body no longer shaking as violently. "Oh Merlin, I love you, my precious, little Merlin. I love you." Another broken sob, "They're going to hurt you, I can't bare to see your body on a pyre, or your head adorning some wall. Please, Merlin, my precious baby." Everything seemed to still, as Hunith's eyes seemed to lose all of their emotion. She moved forward, her body jerking as though the movement was painful. They watched as she moved steadily towards her own small pallet. Gwen felt her horror mounting, as Hunith spoke again. "What would your life be? Constantly running like your father? Will the fear haunt your every step? Will you ever know what it's like to be free? To be accepted? What sort of life would that be? What sort of life could the world give you? There's nothing but pain and fear in your future. Oh, Merlin, my precious baby. There's only one way to save you, only one way to stop them from destroying you."

.***.

Gwen felt as though all of the air was disappearing from the room, everything was moving so slowly as Hunith picked up her blanket, the tears still sliding down her cheeks. Gwen felt frozen, she didn't understand, couldn't understand. Hunith's hand came up, the blanket in it until she was covering Merlin's nose and mouth. Merlin immediately started wiggling, muffled cries escaping past the blanket. His eyes were still uncovered and Gwen was going to be forever haunted by the sight of his baby eyes, wide and terrified, completely unable to comprehend why he couldn't breathe.

"Oh Merlin, my precious Merlin. They would burn you. I cannot watch them do that. I cannot watch them revile you for what you are. I'm so sorry. I love you. I love you, Merlin." Merlin wasn't struggling, wasn't crying. Gwen couldn't even move as she watched Hunith suffocate her own child. This couldn't be happening. This couldn't be happening.

Merlin was alive, he was back in Camelot, drugged, but alive.

She wanted to scream, but the sound wasn't making it past her throat. There was noise from the others, some of them crying out, yelling, but she couldn't make sense of any of it. Her eyes frozen on Merlin, his face turning a terrible blueish pale color.

A small hand made a final effort to reach out for his mother. His eyes still wide and begging. The small hand touched his mother's cheek and it was as though Hunith came undone. She ripped the blanket away from Merlin's face, crying out as though she was in pain. Loud screams filled the air as Merlin once again took air into his lungs, the blue fading as real color returned to his cheeks.

.***.

"I can't lose you." Hunith was holding Merlin tightly to her, even as Merlin screamed, pushing away as though afraid of anything else stopping him from being able to breathe. "Oh baby, I can't lose you. If I must, I shall teach you to never trust. I'll teach you to be afraid, to doubt, to hide. I'll teach you how to survive in a world that would burn you. I won't lose you."

Suddenly Gwen couldn't take it, she turned and fled from the room, and out of the house into the cold outdoors. She had to get away, had to leave, had to escape from everything she'd just seen. Had to put space between her and the almost death of one of her best friends, brought about by his own mother in a desperate, broken attempt to protect him from the cruelties that Gwen had seen rained down on people just like him. The cruelty of the fire that Hunith had seen in his future, the fire that had threatened Gwen, not once, but twice. The fire that she had seen take countless others.

She fell to her knees, bile escaping her mouth as she threw up in the middle of the street. She could see people, but none of them were real, all of them in the past, unaware of the tragedy that had almost happened.

A small hand rested on her back, rubbing back and forth, and Gwen recognized it as Morgana's, though the kindness behind it had been missing for years.

She could feel the rest of them behind her, having left the little cottage where Hunith and Merlin lived, both still crying, though for very different reasons.

She stood, Morgana helping her to her feet. There was an understanding in her eyes that was missing from her own husband's and Gwen was suddenly furious. She took two angry steps forward, her hand coming up of it's own accord, she wasn't sure who was the most surprised at her slap, her, Arthur, or the group watching them. Her hand stung from the strength of the slap, but she didn't apologize. If the real Merlin were here, if he were to see the look in Arthur's eyes right now he would wish that his mother had finished what she had started. Arthur was Merlin's best friend, and the cold, cruel, emptiness would kill him.

It was killing her. She couldn't handle it, the sudden knowledge she'd received, and the understanding it gave her.

Morgana wasn't the crazy one, Merlin was. Morgana's anger and fear, they made sense, Merlin's compassion did not. Arthur didn't deserve him. None of them did. How could Merlin bare to be around them, when they so often condemned him for something he had no control over, when they called him evil and corrupt, and called for his death.

Arthur reeled away from her, shock on his face, but she couldn't say anything, just standing there shaking in a mixture of fear and shock and pain and sorrow and anger.

They all stood there, silent, as figures moved around and through them, the laughter of children incongruous with the heaviness of the moment.

"He's a sorcerer." Arthur's voice was cold, empty, flat.

He was a baby. Gwen wanted to yell the words, but they couldn't escape. Merlin hadn't chosen this, that much was readily apparent. He couldn't even speak yet. How could Arthur be so blind? How could he condemn a child?

Arthur wasn't the only one that had been hurt by magic. Magic had been the reason for her father's death. Had almost caused her own death a number of times. Magic had played a significant role in so much of her suffering. But then, magic had only played half of the role, Uther and his madness had played the other half, and Gwen was suddenly unsure which half had been the most at fault.

She would not stand by and watch a child be condemned. Merlin was a baby, was innocent. Merlin was none of the things that they said magic users were. Merlin was innocent, and kind, and good, and hated to hurt anyone.

"Yeah, and your father was a murderer." Everyone looked up shocked, staring at Gwaine who was staring at Arthur.

Arthur drew himself up to his full height, bristling with anger. "Watch your tongue! That's my father!"

"Does it hurt to hear the truth?" Morgana's voice was bitter, "Does it hurt to realize that he was wrong?"

Gwaine interrupted before Arthur could fire a retort at Morgana, "We all know that if Uther had seen that harmless piece of magic, from an equally harmless baby, Uther would have had Merlin killed. It wouldn't have mattered that he was a baby, that he was innocent. It wouldn't matter that he was far too young to have made a real, conscious choice in the matter, that the magic was a part of him. Your father would have killed him for it."

"He used magic!" Arthur whirled and gestured towards Morgana, "Have you not seen enough of the pain that magic can cause, the way it changes people, twists them." Arthur was yelling now, the anger and the confusion so apparent and it made Gwen ache. She wanted to comfort him, to ease the pain she could see in him.

Morgana was swelling up, any compassion that had been in her eyes slipping away to be replaced with ice.

Gwaine interrupted before the siblings could start yelling at each other. "I have never seen a Unicorn hurt a soul. I have met peaceful druids. I know of men whose lives have been saved by magic. I have just seen an innocent babe use magic without thought. I have seen the kind man that baby became. So yes, I may have seen destruction at the hands of magic." He glanced towards Morgana, who was now glaring at all of them. "But at least I can open my eyes enough to see more than that."

"You think it was the magic that twisted me?" Morgana's voice was quiet, though that didn't stop it from being terrifying. "That it was the magic that turned me against you?" She took a step closer to Arthur, somehow still menacing, despite the fact that she had no more power here than the rest of them.

"You were a good woman, Morgana." Arthur shook his head. "And then you became this."

Morgana laughed, sharp and a little insane. "That wasn't the _magic_ , Arthur. That was the pain, and the fear. That was listening to my friends and my family proclaim me evil and dangerous when I had never done anything. It was listening to Uther threaten death to anyone like me." She shook her head. "But it is so much easier to claim that it was the magic, and not the pain that you and Uther caused me. To pretend that you played no role in my pain, to pretend that Uther was a good father and a good king when all he was was a tyrant."

Arthur looked ready to retort, and Gwen stepped forward to place a comforting but restraining hand against arm. Arthur hesitated at her touch before finally turning away from both Morgana and Gwaine.

Gwen could see the look in his eyes that meant he felt unsure and confused. So much of what he believed being called in to question.

Gwaine spoke again, stooping to the ground to pick up a stone. "I could take this stone and bash you in the head. I could put it in a sling and kill you with it, I could use it to start an avalanche. I could take this stone and build a fire pit, or put it in the foundation of a wall. I can do whatever I want with this stone, but that doesn't make the stone anything more than a stone. The stone has no choice what it is used for, that's my choice." He stared at Arthur before tossing the stone to him. Arthur caught it almost instinctively and Gwen saw him stare at it confused. "Magic didn't make Morgana evil, Morgana made her own choices. Magic doesn't make Merlin evil, that's completely Merlin's choice."

Arthur just shook his head. "I don't know." He turned away from them. "I just don't know."

Before any of them could say anything the world went white.

 **AN: I love you all, sorry for the massive delay. And for those who've checked in with me. Thank you. It means a lot to me. Sorry if I haven't responded, I'm sometimes just really bad for that.**

 **Have a good day! (And for those of you who love Star Wars, happy Star Wars day and May the Force be With You!)**


	4. Of Paths Feared

**AN: For everyone who is still waiting around for me to update, thank you. You are far better than I deserve. And for the person who wanted a celebratory chapter for finishing their unit. Sorry this is belated, but congrats to you!**

The world fell back into place quickly, but Morgana had to take a second to find her balance, and not just physically. Ever since Ariel had first pulled her into the spell Morgana had felt off balance. Her magic didn't work here, and she felt unnerved being surrounded by enemies on all sides, the fact that they couldn't hurt her did little to help her feel comforted. And then to realize that she was not only in the past, but that she'd been pulled there by a Walker of Paths… It was terrifying. Morgause had mentioned Walkers before, they weren't particularly powerful, nothing compared to a High Priestess of the Old Religion, but Morgana knew that only a fool would ignore a Walker that had decided to intervene.

Neither she nor Morgause would have ever been able to power a spell such as this.

And then to discover that Merlin had magic. Morgana felt betrayed. She had turned to Merlin, practically begged him to help her, and he _hadn't_. He had left her to struggle on her own, terrified of herself, terrified of what would happen if anyone else ever realized.

He would have understood her.

She wouldn't have been so alone.

But her outrage and betrayal had taken a backseat as she'd watched Hunith's attempt to spare her son a life of pain and fear.

There was mercy in death.

Even now, she wasn't sure how she felt. She was still so angry. Angry at Arthur, at Gwen, at Camelot. Angry at Merlin. Angry at Uther. There was so much to be angry at.

But she had felt compassion too. Compassion for Hunith and the impossible decision she'd had to make. Compassion for Gwen who saw past the accusations and straight to the horror of the situation. Compassion for Merlin, and the fact that his entire life must have been filled with that same fear she had felt after she'd discovered her magic and before she'd escaped Camelot. It didn't by any means mean that she'd forgiven them, her hatred still far outshone her compassion. But while she was stuck here, she would hold to that compassion. Her hatred would only make her sense of powerlessness more painful.

It had been a long time since she had felt compassion for anyone that was not Aithusa.

She glanced at Mordred, she had felt compassion for him, but then he'd betrayed her, the way everyone else had.

She turned away, because beneath the anger was pain. She was so tired of the pain and the hurt. She was tired of the anger too, but she would hold onto that anger and pain and hate until there was actual change. She may feel compassion for Merlin's plight. But she couldn't condone his decision to sit back and do nothing while their people suffered.

She turned away from her introspection and instead watched the scene before her. Some time had passed, because Merlin was no longer a baby, but a toddler, Morgana would venture a guess that he was probably about three.

Merlin was following behind his mother's skirts, giggling quietly to himself every time his mother turned around, trying valiantly to stay hidden behind her. Whenever he failed he would throw his hands up and over his eyes as though that actually solved the problem. Without fail Hunith would laugh and make a show of searching for him. Every time she 'failed' to find him Melrin would beam brightly, his smile wide and happy, and throw himself at his mother, "I'm wite here! Loot! I'm wite here!" Hunith's bright laughter made Morgana ache for simpler times, she missed her father, her real one.

It continued on in this vein as Hunith patiently cleaned the house and began to prepare for the evening meal, Merlin's giggling increasing each time. She didn't even feel the magic before it happened, one moment Merlin was there, the next he was disappearing. She heard Gwen yell Merlin's name in panic, heard Gwaine call out, his voice rising above the others as he pointlessly called out for Merlin. Morgana froze, part of her mind was trying to process the fact that she hadn't felt the magic, but then she'd _never_ felt Merlin's magic. Another part of her mind was trying to compute the fact that Merlin was gone, that he had disappeared. She didn't appreciate the panic that caused her. She didn't care about Merlin. She didn't care about any of them.

She pushed the thought away, it was normal to feel worry when impossible things happened.

Merlin should not have been able to disappear, not at his age, not wordlessly. A second thought occurred to her; what if Merlin hadn't done it? What if someone had discovered Merlin's talent and had taken him?

In the back of her mind she noted that Arthur looked just as panicked as Gwen, Gaius, and the knights.

Arthur may not realize it yet, but he would forgive Merlin. She wasn't fool enough to believe that forgiving Merlin would be the same thing as accepting Magic, but it was also the best chance that Magic had.

She wondered if forgiving Merlin would lead to him forgiving her. But then, she wasn't sure she wanted to be forgiven. At least not for everything. The death, yes. Even she knew that she'd crossed terrible lines. But her anger? No, she wasn't sure that that was something that she needed forgiveness for.

He was the one who had followed Uther faithfully.

She watched as Hunith turned around to 'find' her missing son, watched as her face went from fake surprise to real surprise to utter terror. Hunith's face was easy to read, much like her son's was. Merlin's feelings had always been so easy to read, even if she hadn't always understood why he'd felt what he'd felt.

She felt her own panic increase as Hunith panicked, calling out desperately for Merlin as she began to search frantically through her home, but it was a small home and there weren't many places to hide, not even for a small three year old.

Hunith stiffened, looking down in confusion as Merlin's voice piped up in the room. "Mother, loot, I'm here! Loot!" Hunith reached down and caught something near the knee of her skirts.

"Merlin! Stop this!"

The whole house was silent, not a single member of the group speaking, each of them tense as they waited for an answer. "Sowwy, mother."

"Come back, Merlin. Come back, now."

"I'm wite here?" It was a question and Morgana felt herself gape in surprise. It was one thing for Merlin to have managed this spell wordlessly, one thing for him to have managed it at this age, but to have done it on accident? To have done it so easily that he hadn't even felt the drain? That was incredible. And a little bit terrifying.

"No, Merlin. I can't see you. I need you to come back."

"I'm wite here!" Merlin's voice, coming from what seemed like nowhere, sounded afraid.

Hunith nodded, breathing in and out a few times. "I know, Merlin, I know. I need you to concentrate for me, concentrate on letting me see you."

"Kahncentrate?"

"Think very hard about letting me see you."

There was silence for a long moment before Merlin slowly reappeared in front of his mother. Hunith breathed out in relief and pulled Merlin in for a tight hug. "You scared me, Merlin. Never do that again."

Merlin nodded, his face serious, even if he was confused. "Ne'er again." He looked incredibly solemn, far more solemn than any three year old should look. "What am I ne'er doing?"

Hunith sighed, a tired sigh that told Morgana that things like this happened far more than they should. "It's all right, Merlin. Just be careful. What have I said about magic?"

The small boy stood straight, lifting his finger to his lips in a shushing motion. "Don't let anyone know, don't let anyone see. If they don't know, then they can't hurt me." He nodded his head seriously, "Keep it a secret. Secrets keep me alive."

Hunith smiled softly, "That's right. Now, who do we tell this secret to?"

Merlin shook his head in unfeigned horror. "No one. No one ever! So I can stay living." Morgana turned her head, not wanting to see the real fear on Merlin's face. Merlin had never known a time when he didn't have to be afraid, had lived his entire life being told to never, ever tell his secret.

She hadn't forgiven him. There was too much hurt between them for that. But she could at least understand why he had never said anything.

How had he managed to stay so happy? So positive? How had his fear not stolen that from him the way her fear had stolen her joy?

They continued to watch as the two of them ate a small dinner together. Merlin had seemingly already put the small incident out of his mind, and was now playing with his food, making funny noises as he pushed it around or smashed it with his fork.

Hunith was watching him, laughter in her eyes, even as she sternly reminded him that he needed to eat his food, not play with it. "You won't become big and strong if you don't eat your food."

Merlin made a funny face at that, but obediently placed a spoonful in his mouth. "Yummy, Mother, yummy yummy!" He immediately returned to pushing his food around. Morgana felt a smile tug at her lips and heard Gwen giggle.

She looked around to see that the knights were watching with different levels of enthusiasm, Gaius looked indulgent, and Mordred looked at Merlin as though he was a fascination. She tilted her head, trying to remember how Mordred had reacted to the reveal of Merlin's magic. He hadn't said anything in defense, though that may have been because Gwen and Gwaine had had that completely in hand, but now that she thought about it, Mordred hadn't seemed even the slightest bit surprised.

Had Mordred known? She remembered the incident, years ago, when Merlin had pulled an injured Mordred into her rooms on the run from the Guards. Mordred had clung to Merlin, terrified but trusting. Who else to trust, in the middle of Camelot, but a magic user. Had Mordred always known?

She pushed the thought away as something to address at a later date, and instead turned her eyes to Arthur. Arthur had retrieved his earlier disapproval and had found a spot in the corner where he didn't have to watch the happy mother and son. She wondered what was bothering him most, the magic, or the fact that Merlin had a loving mother.

She turned away from him, long gone were the days when she felt the need to bring Arthur out of his sulks. Instead she went back to observing the others.

She had met Elyan, once when she and Morgause had used him and Gwen in order to lure Arthur into a trap, and then again, when he'd been captured in her second take over. After the initial torture she'd ignored him in favor of torturing Gwaine further. She winced at that. It was not something she was proud of, even if she knew she'd likely do it again if she found herself in the same situation.

She hated this. She hated how this experience was making her doubt herself and her choices. Everything she'd done had felt necessary, had felt justifiable, at the time. She turned from Elyan to look at Gwaine. He was watching Merlin with a grin on his face, so different from the stubborn defiance he'd shown her.

She remembered the way he'd looked when he'd stood up to Arthur, stone in hand as he defended Merlin. He wasn't afraid of her. Wasn't afraid of Arthur. Wasn't afraid of magic. But here and now she saw a little bit of fear in his eyes as he watched Merlin. It wasn't that he was afraid of Merlin, no, Morgana didn't believe that. It was that he was afraid _for_ Merlin. She remembered when Merlin had disappeared earlier, the way Gwaine had panicked. There had been more emotion in those few moments than there had been the entire time Morgana had had him.

Is this what she was missing? People who would care if she were to disappear? Who would worry about her? Who would defend her when she couldn't defend herself?

There was no one who would care now. Morgause was dead and the rest of her relationships had long since withered and died.

There was no one who would mourn if Morgana were to leave the world.

It was a bitter understanding.

As they adjusted to the evening they all started chatting with one another, and Morgana felt the bitterness strengthen. She pulled herself further away, told herself that it was her choice and that she didn't want to have anything to do with any of them anyways.

She didn't react when Gwaine casually sprawled down near her. "So, this is awkward. What exactly do you think Ariel is trying to do, bringing you along on this little journey into the past?"

Morgana gave Gwaine her best icy glare, the one that used to quail Arthur and that kept people from underestimating her. Gwaine didn't so much as twitch, just sat there waiting for her to answer. Morgana turned away, she didn't like the way Gwaine seemed capable of seeing through her. She thought about what Ariel had said so far, how she had said that revenge wasn't the right path, how she had told Morgana that there was another way.

"Merlin once told me that there was another way." She said quietly, unwilling to let any of the others hear her. She stared at the young boy currently eating his vegetables with a resigned look on his face. "He's wrong." He was, there was no other way. "But she seems to hope that seeing this will be enough to change my mind."

Gwaine made a thoughtful sound. "Well, if Merlin said it, then I'd believe it."

"You don't know what he's done." He'd poisoned her, he'd abandoned her, he hadn't been there for her when she'd needed him.

Gwaine shrugged, "Well, obviously not, that's pretty much the point of this whole thing. But Merlin is a whole lot smarter than people give him credit for being." Morgana glared at him, but Gwaine still wasn't bothered by it. "It's not like your way has done you a whole lot of good."

She wouldn't admit that Gwaine had a point. "And Merlin's way has? You don't think he feels lonely and isolated and scared?" She shook her head, "You've never been surrounded by people who hate you, even if they don't know it."

Gwaine nodded, "Well, maybe you should have figured out a way together."

 _We can find another way._

Even now she remembered that he hadn't just told her that there was another way, that he hadn't claimed to even know another way. He had said that they could find a way together.

"There is no other way."

Gwaine just shrugged, "You can keep saying that, but even I can tell that you don't really believe it."

Mother and son had finished dinner and now Merlin was faithfully following his mother around, trying to help her clean up, though in reality he was being much more of a hindrance than a help, getting in Hunith's way and dropping things.

Too soon Hunith was tucking the small boy under a blanket on the small spot of floor that made up Merlin's bed. She sat down next to the boy, pulling the small ragged blanket tighter around him, before she began to speak, her voice low and soothing as she started to weave him a bedtime story.

It began the same way Morgana remembered her father's stories starting. She settled down to listen, it had been a long time since she'd ever been told a story and she missed it, but slowly her smile faded as the story took a darker twist. The hero saved the injured victims, but instead of a happily ever, he was shunned and despised. Instead of offering friendship, they offered only cruelty, leaving him alone and hurt, not even offering aid to the injuries he'd received while protecting them. Morgana felt her heart grow heavy as Hunith told a story that was too true, too real. This was not a bedtime story, and there would be no happy ending. No, Hunith was spinning a tale of sorrow and abandonment. "This is why we must keep secrets, Merlin. Because if people knew, then they would abandon us too."

The small boy nodded as he repeated the same words from earlier. "Don't let anyone know, don't let anyone see. If they don't know, then they can't hurt me. Keep it a secret. Secrets keep me alive."

Hunith smiled at the boy and leaned down to kiss his forehead, before she stood and moved to her own bed. "I love you, Merlin."

"Love you too, Mother."

Morgana turned away from the scene as Hunith blew out the candle. She was almost grateful when the world turned white.

They were in the grove where they had first appeared and they were all silent as they each took a seat on conveniently placed logs.

Gwen was the first to speak, "That's not what those stories are supposed to be like." Her voice cracked at that and Morgana felt a twinge of pity, though it was nearly overpowered by a wave of condescension. Gwen had a good heart, was sensitive to these sort of things in a way that none of the rest of them were, but she was terribly naive.

No one responded, because what was there to say?

"I have food for you, if you'd like it. And some bed rolls so you can get some rest before you continue on the path." They all turned to see Ariel standing there, a sad look in her eyes. Everyone nodded, though no one actually moved. "The food isn't poisoned, if that's what you're worried about."

Leon broke the silence, "I'd appreciate some food. Thank you." Several others murmured their agreement, though Morgana wasn't sure if she actually wanted to eat. A few moments later bowls of porridge were in front of them. Once upon a time she would have considered the food substandard, though it was far better than some of the things she'd eaten since leaving Camelot.

They ate in silence, all caught up in their own thoughts, or in Morgana's case doing her best to avoid thinking at all. "I thought you said we weren't capable of hurting each other." Morgana blinked, looking at Arthur who was staring at Ariel defiantly.

"Queen Guinevere wasn't attempting to hurt you, not really." Ariel shrugged, "Or maybe I just thought you deserved it." Morgana hid a smirk, seeing Gwen smack Arthur had been the highlight of the day. Ariel shrugged, "However, had Gwaine tried to demonstrate his point by using that stone to actually bash your head in, then the magic would have stopped him." Morgana glanced at Gwaine who just shrugged casually.

"I think we've seen enough, send us home." Ariel sent Arthur a withering look, and Morgana took a bit of her food to hide her smirk.

"You've seen nothing. You'll watch until you're done." She shrugged, "Anyways, the spell has been said, you're stuck watching until it's done."

Arthur looked about to argue but Gaius interrupted. "How is this working? These aren't anyone's memories."

Ariel looked unimpressed, "I'm a Walker of Paths, Magic is everywhere, in everything. What we're seeing are those moments that Magic considered important. It's a complex magic. The only ones who are capable of such magic are Walkers." She hesitated and tilted her head, "Though I would not be surprised if Emrys was capable of the feat."

Morgana felt a thrill of terror down her spine at hearing Emrys' name, but pushed it aside. She refused to be afraid of that old man.

Ariel stood up, shaking out her skirts. "Anyways, sleep well, in the morning you'll begin again." She began to walk away, but she turned at the last moment, "And Gwen?" Gwen looked up, surprise on her face at being personally addressed, "His story has never quite gone the way it was supposed to. He's never quite figured out happy endings." And then she was gone.

Morning came much too early in Morgana's opinion. It had taken her far too long to fall asleep, her thoughts revolving in circles. Anger and confusion and understanding chasing each other around in her brain. It would be so much easier if she didn't understand what it meant to be afraid, but she did, and it was so hard to condemn a person for the mistakes they made while afraid, not when so many of her own choices had been made in fear.

She could smell food and heard a few people start moving. Leon's voice reached her from a log near her. "Didn't get much sleep, Sire?"

"Well, I just discovered that someone I've known for ten years has magic. What do you think?" It was the tone of voice Arthur used when he wanted Morgana to leave him alone to sulk. She had always ignored it, and it seemed Leon was inclined to do the same.

"I think Gwaine may have had a point last night. I owe my life to magic, it was the Cup of Life that healed me."

"He lied to us. All of us. Ever since we've met him."

"Keep it a secret. Secrets keep me alive. Should he have trusted that he wouldn't be sent to either the pyre or the chopping block, the way so many others were?"

Arthur didn't respond and Morgana took the opportunity to pretend to waken. She pushed herself up and heard Leon finish speaking with Arthur quietly. "Just keep watching, Arthur. I have a feeling we're all going to learn more. Probably more than any of us want to learn."

Morgana found that she agreed.

When they next appeared several years had passed, a older Merlin, probably close to seven, was sitting on the branch of a tree, chattering happily.

"Mother says I can't tell a soul. Do trees have souls?" The small boy was looking at the tree with a grave expression and Morgana felt a mixture of confusion and pity that Merlin was so lonely he was turning to trees in search of companionship. "Well, even if you do have a soul, it's not like you can really tell anyone else, can you? So that makes you safe."

Safe, safe. Was there such a thing as being safe?

Gwaine and Elyan were laughing, but Morgana couldn't bring herself to so much as smile.

"Good, because I have so much to tell you. You can be my secret keeper. But don't worry, if you have secrets… can trees have secrets?" There was another pause, "Well, if you do have secrets you can tell them to me. I won't tell anyone. Not even the other trees. The earnestness in his voice caused the rest of the knights to join in the laughter.

"Do you want to hear a secret?" Merlin paused, kicking his legs back and forth as though waiting for a response. "Okay, I didn't mean to, but I may have broken one of Mother's bowls. She doesn't know it's broken though, I might have hidden the pieces, but she won't be happy when she finds out." He sighed, "And I might have also gotten mud on her bed on accident. I didn't mean to, but, well, I don't really remember why I decided to get on her bed in the first place, but it's muddy now. And when I was out in the field with the others…" Merlin fell quiet, and when he spoke again his voice was much quieter. "Do trees have friends?" Silence, "Because the other kids don't like me much. So I don't have any friends. Do you think you'd want to be my friend?"

The knights' laughter petered out at that.

"I've always wanted a friend. The other kids don't let me play with them. Say that they don't want the bastard child near them. I don't even know what that is. I don't know if I should ask mother though, she's already worried enough about me getting along with the others. Do you know a bastard child is? Does that make it so you don't want to be my friend?" Merlin gave the tree an utterly devastated look, that if the tree were a real person, would likely make them feel like a monster if they tried to reject him. "I thought so. I figured that trees were nicer than people. You let me climb you, you can't climb people." He nodded, patting the branch he was sitting on gently. "Oh! I forgot, I was telling you my secrets!" Merlin continued rambling, admitting to various misdeeds that he had committed recently, occasionally giggling in a way that meant he wasn't sorry for all of them.

Morgana raised an eyebrow as the list went on, she didn't remember being that much trouble as a child, but then, she suspected that his list was tame in comparison to what Arthur's would be at that age.

Merlin fell silent, adjusting so that he was leaning against the trunk of the tree. "I thought it would be easier." He said quietly, "To tell you. Sometimes I feel like the secret is going to explode out of me, and it scares me. I hoped that I'd be able to tell you and then the secret wouldn't need to explode, but every time I try to tell you, the words get stuck in my throat and it hurts really bad. Do you think you can forgive me? For not being able to tell you?"

Morgana felt her own throat constrict. She remembered that feeling, like her secret was lurking just at the edge of her skin, in danger of exposing her at any second. The way it had physically hurt to talk about it, the fear twisting the words in her throat like a knife.

Merlin sighed, climbing down from the tree and walking away, a dejected slump in his shoulders.

Arthur was staring at him in confusion. "It's a tree. He can't even tell a tree?" It wasn't anger, and Morgana turned her head. Arthur couldn't understand what a secret like that was like. Couldn't understand what silence meant, and what revealing yourself could cost.

"It's a little disturbing." Gwaine said quietly, "Not Merlin. He's not disturbing. It's just, seven year olds should have that innate distrust. Fear like that isn't natural."

Morgana's head jerked up, "But it is necessary." She knew her words came out bitingly, "This may not be Camelot, but Uther's fear and hatred spread like a plague. Camelot may be the worst, and this close to Camelot would be equally dangerous. His silence isn't some over-exaggerated fear response, his silence is keeping him safe. Keeping him alive."

"You've been fine outside of Camelot." Arthur told her, bitterly.

Morgana didn't think about the time stuck in the well with Aithusa. "Because I've proven that I'm dangerous. They already feared me, hated me, the same way they fear all magic users, even those that have never given them any cause. I just made sure that they feared me enough to stay away. If it came down to my death or theirs, I made sure they knew that they wouldn't be the ones to come out of that engagement alive." Arthur blinked as though he had never considered that she had weaponized herself in order to protect herself. It wasn't the only reason she'd made the decisions she had, but it had played a part. "But he is a child, that isn't an option for him. His only option is silence."

Arthur took a step back, his face troubled. Before Morgana could further drive the point home the world turned white and they landed in Merlin's small home. Merlin was busy sweeping the floor as Hunith was kneading dough to make bread. He would pause every now and then and turn to Hunith, opening his mouth before closing it again and returning to sweeping.

Hunith was watching him, her eyes concerned, but said nothing, letting Merlin take his time.

Finally after Merlin had swept the floor twice he turned to Hunith, a frown on his face. "Old Man Simmons told me what a bastard was." Hunith's eyes widened in shock, before they narrowed dangerously. Morgana would have felt bad for Old Man Simmons if she didn't think the man probably deserved whatever he got. "He also said that my father left because he didn't want anything to do with me. That you didn't want me either, but you couldn't get rid of me."

Hunith's voice was sharp when she responded, "That's a lie, and you know it."

Merlin glanced up, tears in his eyes, "Then were is Father?"

Hunith paused, her eyes softening. "Your Father was a good man, but he was betrayed by someone he thought was noble enough to be trustworthy. He had a story much like the ones I've told you. He left to protect us from those who would hurt him. It breaks my heart to speak of him, I loved him very much, you know."

Merlin looked at her, his eyes grave. "I know that I'm…" he hesitated, "That I was born wrong. That I make your life difficult."

Hunith left her dough behind, moving towards Merlin. She knelt in front of him, her hands coming up to his face, they both ignored the way the dough stuck to his cheek. "You weren't born wrong. I know it's difficult, being different, having to keep everything a secret. But that doesn't mean it's wrong. I am thankful every day that I have you."

Merlin nodded, ducking his head and hugging his mother tightly. He turned back to his broom, going over the floor for a third time. Hunith stood, dashing away a tear from her eye as she moved back to her dough. "All right, Mother." He paused, but then adopted an innocent look. "I didn't like Old Man Simmons anyways." His Mother laughed and Merlin gave her an innocent smile. "I don't know how it happened, but he might have tripped in some mud though."

Hunith laughed harder, shaking her head fondly. "Oh Merlin, what ever will I do with you?"

"Give me food?"

Hunith's laughter followed them into the white.

 **AN: Hey people! If you are reading this, I'm glad you're still around. I can't tell you how much I've appreciated the fact that people still want to see this continued.**

 **I do have a request of you, though. If I take a path (pun) in this story that you don't like. PLEASE don't put in reviews telling me how disappointed you are. I can't make everyone happy, and I'm genuinely sorry you are disappointed. But I'm not going to change my mind and write a different story to make you happy. All that happens is the next time I try to post a chapter I give myself a panic attack and then decide to not post the chapter and it takes me over a month to actually post an already finished chapter.**

 **I apologize if this makes me sound overly sensitive. But... well, I'm very rejection sensitive. I do this for fun, please, please, I have very few aspects of my life that don't give me major anxiety, please don't make this one of those things.**

 **Again, thank you for reading my chapters, and for giving me encouragement. I love the majority of comments I get.**

 **You people really are awesome. I genuinely and sincerely hope you DID enjoy the chapter and that you'll enjoy the chapters to come.**


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